February 13, 2009

Plague of Madness

I have always loved the expression "plague of madness", but never really have a great opportunity to use it. I suppose it would be easy to find occasion to us it. I could pepper my tirades with it when talking about banker bonuses, wars in the middle east, stimulus packages, my local weather and, on many days, even my home environment.

But I don't use it, because it seems like it just begs to be saved for a special occasion.

That occasion came last night at about 10:45 when I was pushing a basket around Wal-Mart trying to find some cool valentines for my son's party today. I wandered slowly around the candy aisle looking for just the perfect thing, then headed over to another section of the store where they had all the cheapie kids valentines.

That's when I saw it... the bathing suits. Or more accurately, the bathing suits in February when we've just had an ice storm and people STILL have no power and may not for another 2-3 weeks.

There they were, all skimpy and dangling from their plastic hangers. Look at me, they say, perky and dazzling. And that's when it came to my mind.... Plague of Madness!

The long running joke is that Christmas gets promoted by retailers sooner and sooner every year, but it's not just Christmas. Retailers have basically just taken the knob of the marketing year and twisted it half a turn so that we're buying Christmas stuff before Halloween and bathing suits in freakin' February.

Run through the house with your hands waggling above your heads and yell, "PLAGUE OF MADNESS!!"

It feels really good.


  1. Is going to run around with my hands waggling above my head and yelling, "PLAGUE OF MADNESS!!" just because you said it feels really good...brb...


    LOL :-D

  2. I'm gonna' yell it in my bikini...out in the rain...in freakin' February! *LOL* Why not? Hmmm...I know I have some fins and goggles around here somewhere...

  3. hehehe :) Hey Wendy..did you write the post about eating a hot dog wrapped in a corn tortilla? I think your mom told you to eat it...I'm dying over trying to remember and may be going through posts too fast to find out for sure if it was you lol I wrote a post about it this morning. If it WAS you I'm gonna smack ya! haha jp :-D

  4. I just tried it in my office. It DOES feel good ... although no one will ever be able to take me seriously again ...

  5. Ooh I think I'm gonna say that today too when the kids come home. We've had a rough week as it is.

    They had the suits out in Target here BEFORE Christmas. In St Paul. In Minnesota.

    I realize people go on cruises but shouldn't stores just have a small selection of suits all year long instead of a HUGE section at this time of year? But dang, that would make SENSE. Then we couldn't have PLAGUE OF MADNESS! Sounds like something in wrestling;).

  6. @Neen, you can be like those polar bear club people! If you do it take a picture. I have to see this!

    @Kathy, yes it was me! Here is the link to the original post. Also, I told my mom you made her famous and printed out your post for today so she could read it. She sent a message back to you on yours. :)

  7. A picture of me in a bikini would blind you forever and cause your BRAIN to suffer a PLAGUE OF MADNESS MWAAAAH *L*


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